Talk about him.
Help me to remember, that’s what I want. Tell me stories I didn’t already know. Talk to me about that special memory. “Remember when…” is my new favorite expression.
If you cry or I cry that’s OK. We loved him and we miss him. Crying is a natural reaction. Don’t feel like you hurt me. The hurt is there all the time, whether I cry or not, whether you speak or not.
Don’t look away. Don’t avoid me. Don’t look uncomfortable when I talk about him. Talking about him helps me, a lot. If you want to provide comfort it’s the very best way.
Don’t avoid the subject. It’s never far from my thoughts anyway.
I know it’s scary. I stand as a personification of your greatest fear. I’m sorry about that. I wish it wasn’t so, but it is, and I lack the power to change it.
I’ll forgive you if you say the wrong thing. But don’t say nothing, that hurts the most.