I’ve been struggling with how to incorporate Kevin into our holiday traditions. I found a mini-video disk a couple of months back. It was from Christmas 2009. It’s all so different now.
I guess I sort of expected there to be an “ah ha” moment when I’d think of something and it would be perfect. I need to stop having expectations about such things. Do something even if it’s not perfect.
We included some snapshots of Kev on our holiday card again this year. I’m not sure when we’ll stop that. He’s still part of our family. I’ll stop when I feel like it, but not before. If other people aren’t comfortable I apologize in advance.
I’ve decided on a couple of things for this Sunday. We’ll set an extra place at the table, not just for Kevin, but for everyone we’ve lost who can’t be with us. For me it’s for Kevin, Mom, Dad, Butch and Petey, but it’s really for every person in attendance to decide who to invite to dinner.
I think I’ll light a candle. I see it as a reminder of the light we’ve lost but I hope it will also be a beacon so that those who have moved on can find us and join us.
I was also thinking of making the kids wait a while before they open up their gifts, like we used to wait for Kev to come home in the morning, but I need to run this by Lisa. We could use that time to think and reflect, and maybe even to heighten the anticipation of gift opening for the kids. Sometimes there’s a little let down after everything is ripped through. Maybe we can have a little less avarice this year.
I wish everyone a Joyous Christmas, a Happy and Healthy New Year and that many precious memories are made in 2012. Be safe.